Kid Pics

A Few Good Questions

A week ago Sunday, our Pastor spoke about growing your faith. He talked about how people don't just magically grow into extremely faithful people. We make financial plans, career plans, even family plans but how many of us make faith plans?

He posed a few questions to get us planning. I've thought and thought but I'm not sure how to answer them! What do you think?

1. How do you plan to reach your neighbors?

2. What's your plan to spiritually develop your children?

3. How do you plan to grow your marriage?

4. How do you plan to develop your quiet time?

As for number 4, he talked about how he knew what he wanted his time with God to look like & then took baby steps. To be honest, Im not even sure what I think it should look like. What are your thoughts?

Bob & I plan to sit & discuss we just haven't had time yet! Imagine that. Maybe this week. When we do, I'll let you have a look!



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Pumpkin Patch 2010

This morning we brought the boys to Iowa Orchards for a hayride, some games & pumpkin pickin'. I of course dressed us like it is October but it feels like summer so we were all a little on the warm side. This pumpkin patch has a hayride that takes you to a little area with slides, face painting and a "cornbox" (imagine sandbox with corn instead of sand). Ollie had a great time. He picked a pumpkin for him and one for Dawson. Here are a few pictures of our adventure.

Rejoicing

Yesterday, after 16 days in the NICU (not counting yesterday), we took our little guy home. Sixteen days feels like an eternity when you are split in two. Now I realize that there are people who have much longer stays in the NICU and some who don't leave with a baby. I am thankful we did. I cried driving home with him in the van. What an amazing day and I really think it was that much sweeter because I now know how hard it is to leave a baby and go home.

Oliver loves his baby brother. He asks to hold him and kisses him all the time. It is so adorable. He also "reads" to Dawson and shares his toys by piling them on his chest. My favorite is when he says something like, "Want a turn with the train Dawson?" The way he says Dawson is awesome.

It's amazing how your love isn't split when you have another child, it's multiplied. We give all the praise and glory to Him who saves.

Let's talk bout something else

So I've done a lot of whining and blubbering over the last two weeks and thought maybe you'd want to hear about my other child. Ollie has faired remarkably well and has gotten the priviledge of spending extra time with his Auntie Jade, Grandma Carol and Nana while I've been at the hospital. Lucky for me, I've gotten to spend some time with him too! He is growing and changing so much.

One of the most exciting moments was when we had went to watch a backhoe work down the street and the driver let ollie in the cab! Ollie even got to put his hands on the driver's hands while he lifted and dumped the bucket. As one would expect, I of course did not have a camera with me. But, I did happen to have one when we went to babiesrus and they had a little tractor dealy. So here is one of that!

Yesterday, Ollie and I went on an adventure to sculpture park in downtown Des Moines. We really enjoyed looking at (& attempting to climb on) each sculpture. I took a bunch of pictures of my guy.

With so much reason for hope, why do i feel hopeless?

Lord,

As I am sure you are aware, yesterday was a crappy day. I can praise you that someday my baby will come home but right now it doesn't feel like it. I'm tired of people telling me to "try to relax" or have patience. I'm pretty sure they've never been here. Your word tells me that "the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace and patience," so why don't I feel peaceful and patient? Right now to be honest this just plain sucks. I am positive that you can end this right now and he could go home tomorrow. Whatever the reason, you aren't doing that. So if there is something I am supposed to learn please tell me. I'm tired of going places and feeling like people are wondering if I'm pregnant since I have a bit of a tummy. I want to tell them I just have a baby but I have no baby to show them. I'm tired of an empty belly and empty arms. I'm tired of going into an empty nursery to pump and staring at an empty crib. Forgive me for being impatient. I know you understand. I know you want me to have the desires of my heart so Lord I beg you to get him well quickly. I am already in pieces and I am not sure how much more I can take.

Forgive me for my jealousy when I see Facebook posts of new moms bringing home their new babies or when I see them in the store. This is really hard. I know you are there and I know there is much reason to have hope. This is temporary and eventually I will be in heaven for eternity with you but right now, I am here and this really hurts.

I'll praise you because you are worthy Lord, because you sent your son to die for me. I'll praise you because you gave me two boys and a loving husband. Grant me peace and patience. Help me to feel hopeful Lord.

Love Always

Autumn

Can I add a few?

So I was thinking about my earlier post & I need to add a few more ways God has prepared us for this:

9. Because we moved, I am now a full time stay at home mom. Although I loved my job at Crossroads, I think I'd have been really stressed out trying to cover myself and be sure everything was ready each week.

10. In our Bible study of 8 couples (I think), three other couples have had babies in the NICU. Now you may think that's bad luck, I think it's providence.

Update:

Today Dawson went off oxygen around 8:30 am. I nursed him at 8 pm. He is doing really really well. I am hopeful this will all be behind us really soon!

In other news, Ollie is handling this about as well as can be expected. I feel like he changes every time I leave. He is excited about this imaginary being but also pretty darn jealous.He has had lots of visitors which is great. I love my boys!